From one of the books of my childhood, Hope for the Flowers, illustrated and written by Trina Paulus.

~PB

sapphonarcisso:

pablobanila:

I will die for the beauty of seeing you seeing this.

(Everyday I dreamed of confessing to you by spelling your name as skylanterns shrinking to the stars. I dreamed of it for 7 years, was only able to paint it, and decided to die.)

~Pablo Banila

You.

Proken Butterfly.

~PB

P.S. My initials form a typographical masterpiece of a metaphor.

Proken Butterfly.

~PB

P.S. My initials form a typographical masterpiece of a metaphor.

It’s Xmas allright. My bloodstream is striped peppermint and I feel like snuggling in a stocking as a gift wrapped in my arms, a candy cane dreaming to be goo.



Hist! Shining Lucifer sings
with broken wings:
“You are wrong.”
Glory to the new born King.



Blasphemies to Heaven and Satanic references repressed inside, the natural universe has yet to falsify string theory among other attempts at unifying fundamental physics forces into a GUT (Grand Unified Theory). Classical mechanics serves its purpose faithfully in macroscopic bodies, while quantum mechanics describes the behavior of atomic and subatomic particles. String theory promises to unify both scales through the probability of an occurrence of a black hole the size of an atom — a massive particle that should demonstrate both classical and quantum behaviors.

“The intricate dynamics of Rundvelt Goblin affairs are often confused with anarchy. The chaos, however, is the chaos of a thundercloud, and direction will sporadically and violently appear. Pashalik Mons and his Raiders are the thunderhead that leads in the storm.” ~Mons’s Goblin Raiders

The irony of chaos is its inherent order. The irony of order is its inherent chaos.

I know it’s hard to imagine — like twin brothers lovingly consuming each other’s excrement while giggling at a rabbit with a pancake on its head — but this is reality and weird shit is weird shit.

Visualizations of this dualistic mystery is provided by Daniel Becker: http://pablobanila.tumblr.com/tagged/Daniel_Becker

The existence of a multiverse is postulated by the Standard Model of particle physics. The order in a multiverse is that the probability distribution of a wave function is predetermined. The chaos is that the state of a particle, once measured, is impossible to predict.

~PB, formspring.me/pablobanila

“Upon reading a portrait of him, he wondered, ‘Did I paint these words, or do these words paint me?’ ” ~Bei Shun Tzu, Butterfly Stain on Centerfold

His every essay is crowned with a nugget off the Golden Age of Chinese Philosophy and robed in an embroidered silk of eloquence, in the likeness of his being. Ass on throne and scepter in hand, he flushes it down from Heaven unto the wasteland of earthly vanity, fertilizing hope of divine salvation.

He walks the Way of the Warrior who Wushu’d his way with the machine gunfire of modernization and died an honorable and hilarious death, as his time-honored virtues are tested in the torture chambers of Science and Technology. Could he, like when Chuang Tzu dreamed he was a butterfly, be Confucius hypnic-jerking off a nightmare? Can he incorporate his traditional ethics with the modern theories of human rights and democracy, and wake up in ancient China with a smirk on his face and some dirty laundry? Only Bei Shun Tzu can answer absurdity.

~PB, Oblique Lepidoptery

P.S.

Butterflies are palindromes.

In my s3xyASSSpread, I wrote as Bei Shun Tzu as a parody of Chuang Tzu (Master Chuang: Master Bei Shun) and his butterfly dream:

“Am I Chuang Tzu who had dreamt that I was a butterfly, or am I a butterfly dreaming that I am Chuang Tzu?” ~Chaung Tzu, Butterfly Dream

When the book of our lives closes all stains of filth on its pages achieve supersymmetry, like palindrome butterflies.

Like an anguish cry for love, returned. Requited. Echoed.

I’d been thinking tortuously over the profoundest reply to Echolocation. I thought of my music video; but I realized that my own reply to my Nothingness is but superficial.

The profoundest return of all, is Da Vinci and his ambigrams.

Ambigrams.

Not a mere sappy mirror reflection, but an utter and complete destruction that defines the creation.

A butterfly twisted and torn in half.

The s3xyASSSpread twisted and torn in half.

“SOBRANG TIGAS ANG ASTIG BINALIGTAD” ~PB

The trace of twirling Metal was not an attempt to simply twist this 1:4:9 Monolith but an overwhelming force of Will to rip it, bend it, and snap it in half. The swirls came only after I was torn apart.

Da Vinci would have fallen in love.

The Mona Lisa would have been twisted and torn in half.

~PB, Oblique Lepidoptery

P.S.

Butterflies are palindromes.

OH, MY GOD

I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS

I’M THE INVENTOR OF THE HOT NEW WORD “TUMBOBULAR”

TUMBOBULAR!!!

TUMBOBULAR!!!

REMEMBER MEEE WHEN YOU BECOME TUMBOBULAR!!!

AHUHU

Just read it here: http://ayanamidreams.multiply.com/journal/item/13/Pablo_Banilas_Secret_Love_Story_Part_3_of_Ghost_Carnival_Museum

Just a bit about grammar — something I got from Noam Chomsky:

You must be familiar with B. F. Skinner (: the most influential behaviorist. (Behaviorism basically tries to explain Everything in terms of reaction to stimuli. Even thoughts.) He tried to explain grammar as a result of the formative feedback/positive reinforcement (Pavlov’s dogs) parents provided their children to conjugate verbs, add on plurals, pronounce words etc. Babies learned to combine the sounds they first associated with things into sentences over time. For example, if you saw my headshot in your viewing history and said “MOTHERFUCKER” LOL Skinner would tell you that your mommy and daddy taught you to associate my face to the appropriate adjective LOLOLOL!!! “Verbal behavior”, in behaviorist theory. And if you said “Pablo Banila”, Skinner would tell you that it is a verbal behavior which summons every stimulus associated with my name, say, “ugly motherfucking faggot of a negro”.

In this behaviorist model of language, a lapse in grammar is explained away as lack of education. (No mommy and daddy to stop me from breaking the law.)

Chomsky falsified that behaviorist approach.

According to Skinner, we learn specific grammatical rules that mandate specific words in specific contexts. A noun may be followed by a verb, which may be followed by another noun then adjectives may be sprinkled to your level of pretension (LOL). According to this model, a word is generated from the previous word according to probability. “Pablo Banila stalks” is more probable than “Pablo Banila pogi”, for example.

“Colorless green ideas sleep furiously.”~Pablo Banila

“Pablo Banila, I don’t understand why you have to muddle my guestbook with the involuntary mutterings of your uneducated mind.”~Alexander De La Fuente

“Colorless green ideas sleep furiously.”~Noam Chomsky

“Noam Chomsky?! This is impossible! You are the most cited intellectual in the last century! Only in Pablo Banila’s ‘Sour World of Gummy Everythin’ ^____^ Vitamin C Smiley!’ can ideas sleep! And how is green colorless?”~Alexander De La Fuente

“Hmmm… you’re absolutely right, Allen. I got it from Pablo Banila’s ‘Sour World of Gummy Everythin’ ^____^ Vitamin C Smiley!’.”~Noam Chomsky

The sentence “Colorless green ideas sleep furiously.” is actually from Chomsky (: He demonstrated that such a ridiculous sentence is technically impossible in a statistical model of language, yet grammatically feasible! Grammar, therefore, exists independently of words. A word is not generated by the previous word according to the laws of probability; there are structures governing words and they come from the mind.

Chomsky hypothesized that a universal grammar, a deep structure of language is innate to the human brain. All languages, though words might be different, share the same form. A group of isolated deaf children would suddenly start communicating with their hands without having been taught sign language, creating a makeshift vocabulary. Eventually, this makeshift vocabulary would be given a structure by a second generation without having been taught grammar. Polyglot mixtures of slaves in plantations evolved a common, rudimentary language called pidgin, which developed into various languages with all the grammatical features of established languages.

“If an unusual foreign word be introduced, if the grammar trips, or if a term from an incongruous vocabulary suddenly appears, the sentence detonates, as it were, we receive a shock from the incongruity, and the drowsy assent is gone.”~William James,”Principles of Psychology”

Alexander De La Fuente has at this point hypothesized that Pablo Banila’s lapses in grammar come from Pablo Banila’s deconstructed mind. The point is, does Pablo Banila make a point, anyway?

“Any collocation of words may make sense — even the wildest words in a dream — if one only does not doubt their belonging together.”~William James,”Principles of Psychology”

Everything is contextual. Words are always interconnected by syntax and no word exists alone. Anything can never mean nothing.

“Pablo Banila pogi”~Alexander De La Fuente

~Pablo Banila
pogi

carmelsegal:

pablobanila:

please don’t hate yourself.. you are loved :)

);

That’s why it hurts…

It hurts me, so much…

Being human, our ability to reciprocate empathy is limited to about 7 other people on average.

On Facebook, the average number of contacts for each account is about 150.

The average number of contacts tagged in one person’s photo albums is about 7.

Now imagine yourself in my place, having promoted myself silently within social networks all over the world.

The average person can only humanely remember about 150 other people of his life.

I have to remember 150 million.

And I have to reciprocate all that personal attention.

And though it hurts, I’ve already found a way.

This is the core of my master’s thesis, and the subject of my non-fiction novel to be released Summer 2010.

This is why I can’t be in any relationship until I finish my works…

This is why my all my attempts to be in one were tragic failures of divine comedy.

Be merciful to me, a fool.

~PB

HEAVY METAL? FUCK YEAH! ANIME? FUCK YEAH! GENERAL CALCULUS OF HYPERDYADIC PSYCHOGENESIS IN FRACTAL NEUROTHEOLOGY? FUCK Y

i think this is very interesting, my philosophy GSI made mention to us undergraduate-lings that humans only have the capacity to remember at most 200 people and one snide dolt remarked about how he had over 500 facebook friends. dolt.

Yes, it is very interesting and mathematically and computationally complex, too ): But I leave that complexity to my genius friends (: they love me that much and I love them back as much!

The working title of the final draft is “Towards a General Calculus of Hyperdyadic Psychogenesis in Fractal Neurotheology” and is an interdisciplinary thesis that provides a tool of measurement — a hypercalculus — of various processes behind the years worth of mess I donated to the Internet in terms of modern neuroscience and social network science, and a demonstration of its repeatability.

It’s pretty much about God and your mind shitting bricks and stuff.

~PB

fuckyeahexistentialism:

“Thus I draw from the absurd three consequences, which are my revolt, my freedom, and my passion. By the mere activity of consciousness I transform into a rule of life what was an invitation to death, and I refuse suicide.”

—

Albert Camus, The Myth of Sisyphus.

From: Something to Look Forward to. (Not That Something to Look Forward to.)

…if I ever believe only in one thing, it most definitely would not be this: “The world does not have to make sense.”

Sadly, this absurdist line of thought is the root of [most forms of transgression].

The truth value of that statement is irrelevant for it is true by tautology — that is, “The world makes sense or the world does not make sense.” It is the attitude, it is the decision, it is the existential choice that determines whether one can say “The world makes sense” in total retaliation against nihilism. It is the establishment of a standard, of one’s code of values to be the foundation, measure, and reference of everything to be known.

Humanity survives not because of those who have given up. Humanity thrives because of those of us who believe that there is something to look forward to.

~PB
is looking forward to a pleasant, relaxing weekend for the both of us!